I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
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