You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
I need water and some morals
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
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