I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Randomize
