you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
Randomize
