i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Randomize
