I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
Randomize
