kristin has been a bad kristin
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
