Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
