Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
Randomize
