You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
