my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Randomize
