i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
Randomize
