omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
Randomize
