beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize