Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
