Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
Who put my cat in the fridge?
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
Randomize
