she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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