is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
Randomize
