Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
Randomize
