the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
Everything about him screamed your future.
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
Randomize
