theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Randomize
