Christians are straight up FREAKS
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Randomize
