whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
Randomize
