I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
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