i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
he quoted the bible to break up with me
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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