Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
Randomize
