mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
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