i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
If a cop asks you "Where do you go for fun?", it's not a pick up line...especially if he just pulled you over.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
