if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Randomize
