plz talk dirty to me
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Randomize
