i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
Randomize
