she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Randomize
