I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
Randomize