is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
Just brought out that old CCM hockey helmet. The one covered in sharpie penises with "DRUNK BUCKET" written across the front. The number of tally marks / initials from tonight's drunk stunts alone is equal parts inspiring and alarming.
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
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