I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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