I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Randomize
