Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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