Michael Bay diarrhea
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
