sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
i dont even know how to be here
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
I have post one night stand depression
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