We should be called the Road Head Warriors
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
