I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Randomize
