I seem to have left my pride at pride
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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