I just farted so loud that my cat got so scared he fell off the couch.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
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