i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
Randomize
