Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
Randomize