im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
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