hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
it wasn't lemon gatorade
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
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