how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
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