I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
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