Just mADE A PArabola og urine
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
A+ Viking dick
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
