whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
