Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Randomize
